“Community is Inconvenient”

I reject that notion.

TikTok has been full of people opining about how and why we should lean into lopsided communities.

I think the hell not.

The community is actually tired of being abused.

People are tired of showing up consistently and genuinely, only to be met with apathy, silent competitions, and secret animosity. People are tired of only being contacted when they're needed. People are over showing up with open hands , ready to serve, while entitled people sit back with their hands stuffed in their pockets. People are sick of being emotional kickstands only to be met with unreturned calls and texts when they need respite.

The lack of social graces and unrequited thoughtfulness make community inconvenient.

Expecting people to continually show up for you when you don't try to offer anything in return is absolutely egotistical.

We may not always be able to pour into our village the same way they pour into us, but the whole point of community is bringing what you have to the table. Our ancestors did not show up to the cookout with the same contributions. Someone made the ribs, someone brought the liquor, someone brought the plates and cups.

That's community. That's how we survive.